A Reading From the Holy Gospel According to Sanctus

I thought that it was about time that all of you (save one, and I know who you are) would enjoy new bits of wisdom from Sanctus:

• "You've got to watch out for these nuns. You don't know what they're gonna try to pull."
• "It's gotten to the point where one lady has to read, serve and give out communion at Daily Mass. I asked her this morning when she was going to start wearing the vestments."
• "Latin was great. But every time I had to say the Confiteor I said it differently!"
• "I went to Mass one in the Thousand Islands, and it was in this big auditorium. The Protestants were on one side, the Catholics on the other, so two services were going on at once. Well, at communion time, I accidentally got into the wrong line, so I got the Protestant bread instead of the real stuff. Whenever I go to Mass there (DoR) I feel like I'm in the wrong line, like I'm there for a Protestant service instead of Mass."
• "When I was an altar boy (1920's), there were so many nuns, and I'd usually serve for the priest saying Mass in their chapel. Gee, you wouldn't believe what those nuns said before and after Mass. I even heard one giving one of those 'Knock Knock Jokes' to a priest. I didn't know nuns were human before that!"

I hope you are sufficiently tickled by these recollections.


To you, "Anonymous," what would your priest say if he saw what you were typing? I pray you will refrain from posting here any heated comments alleging elder abuse etc . . .